It’s been almost a decade since I smoked weed and I’ll be honest with you – I miss it! Why, I remember smoking and getting so high that it felt like I was melting into the sofa I was sitting on; my vertabrae so relaxed that each one would slowly and with supremely satisfying “POP!” noises, loosen and relax all the way down.
POP! POP! POP!
The reason I tell myself that I won’t smoke weed anymore is because I’m afraid it will rob me of my productivity. You can pretty much put a fat red “X” on the day I decide to get blasted because all I’m going to do is sit around and dream, or tune out and pretend like I’m somehow being enlightened.
Sidebar: did you know that the peaceful-loving-weed-induced outlook on life can be as self-righteous as anything? It’s pretty disgusting.
So I don’t smoke weed and guess how productive I am? I’m not. And why not? Because I’ve replaced weed with other things. I can kill hours watching YouTube and Netflix. Every night I toss back 1,2..4 beers and then I zone out. Sound familiar? Sure, different high – same result. And that’s not all – there are LOTS of things I do to fill the time where I could be moving closer to my goals.
So it’s not weed, and it isn’t even alcohol. It’s not YouTube, Netflix, books, food – oh food is a good one! What it is.. is buffering. We do ALL of these things and more to buffer against the hard choices we have to make in the moment. It’s like my coach said the other day, “We all want to be lions until it’s time to be lions!” When it’s time to make the hard choices, we buffer..I buffer, procrastinate, make excuses – in the case of weed, I would drift off into stoner-dreams of motivated inaction, filling my head with all the amazing things I’m going to do.. someday.
So what are your buffers? How are you numbing yourself to the hard work that is life and how are you going to overcome?
EDIT: I realize marijauna doesn’t effect everyone in the same way. This is just my reflection on how it affects me. Thanks 🙂